50. JIG

another film about aspiring children....and, their parents.  this time, the topic is irish dancing, which as we learn in the film is not performed strictly by irish lineage.  we meet several participants, all who compete in the world championships in glascow.  just as with any high level competitors, these kids put their heart and soul into hours of practice and performance.  the parents put all their hope and finances into making a dream come true for their children.  i didn't really learn much about irish dance exactly....like, why don't they use their arms, and why are all the curly wigs a part of it for the girls?  not as surprising is learning most of the boys don't really publicize that they are irish dancers.  i may not have learned too much about irish dance, other than the fact that is produces strong competition, but i am reminded again that parents will sacrifice profoundly for the happiness of their children.

49. MAGIC TRIP

i always wished i was old enough to be a hippie.  packing into a bus, driving across the united states, living, and loving, maybe with the assist of some drugs--just being.  my thoughts about a hippie lifestyle, and probably those of most people, likely come from the magic trip that ken kesey and the merry pranksters took in the psychedelically painted "further" bus in 1964.  the film reconstructs over 30 hours of footage that was filmed over the several week trip, cut and interspersed with audio of each prankster remembering and commenting on the trip 10 years later.  kesey had intended to make his own documentary, but never finished.   deciding to go to the new york world's fair served as the impetus of the trip; but, of course, it all became so much more.  kesey had written "one flew over the cuckoo's nest" and "sometimes a great notion", but was burned out on writing.  he'd also had multiple experiences with the altered consciousness created by dropping acid following his first experience being a subject in a stanford university scientific experiment on the drug.  combined, the psychedelic experience was documented while it happened.  the pranksters get stuck in the desert; unknowingly swim in a segregated lake in new orleans; finally make it to new york only to be disappointed by the fair; party with alan ginsberg; hang at the home of timothy leary, play in yellowstone national park and return to san francisco where they revel in the music of the grateful dead--all the while smoking pot, dropping acid, having sex and filming everything.  i love this period in our history.  i really enjoyed learning more from the very beginnings of what is now perceived to be a hippie lifestyle.  very free; very cool; very magical.

48. GOOD 'OL FREDA

freda kelly was a young secretary in liverpool when a couple of coworkers took her to lunch at the cavern, where a young local group was performing.  she took an immediate liking to the music of the beatles and spent nearly 200 lunch hours or weekends watching their shows and getting to know them.  when brian epstein signed on with them as manager, he chose freda to be secretary.  she started the beatle fan club as well, and worked in the position for 11 years until the group went their separate ways.  freda is an amazing woman.  all that she knew and saw and heard and experienced--she remained totally loyal to the privacy of the members of the group.  indeed, after she resigned from her job when pregnant with her second child, she closed the book.  people close to her in later years, including her own children, rarely heard any stories of her time with the beatles.  after the death of her son and the birth of her grandson, she realized she actually wanted a piece of her legacy recorded, and so became this documentary.  as freda herself says, "i'm not famous.  i'm not rich.  i still work as a secretary.  i've come full circle.  when this film is done, i'm done telling my story".  the film is full of beatles' music, photos and footage and concludes with a personal message from ringo.  freda began as a fan, worked as a fan, and is still a fan.  she notes that they had so much fun in the beginning.  she always believed they would be a success, though she admits she never imagined the worldwide fame they enjoyed.  "i thought it would be success if they got a song on the charts."  she acknowledges she was naive when she started with them, but grew quickly with them.  how fortunate were the beatles to have freda in the inner circle??  it makes me wonder why any one, or all, of them hasn't done more for her in the past 50 years.  at least, the four were on board to allow their songs to be used in the film, the money for which was raised through kickstarter.  good 'ol freda is truly good.

47. THUNDER SOUL

funk.  jazz.  show band.  jazz band.  early 70's.  kashmere high school in houston, tx.  "prof" conrad johnson wrote the music, instructed the students, and led them this all-black band to national championships during a time when they were the ONLY such group. the band was essentially unbeatable.  the students toured europe and japan and released albums.  it was a magical time.  many noted that they were as good as any professional music group.  the students come back together for a tribute concert to the now 92yo band leader; the man who not only taught them the music, but guided them in life, teaching discipline, respect, and self-worth and pride in themselves.  the spirit and the music is amazing; there are lots of clips from the past, full of afros, pleated shirts and bell bottoms.  many of the past band members haven't even held their instrument since they graduated high school, but prof taught them so well, they are able to pick up where they left off and grow more successful with each day of rehearsal, culminating in the final concert.  this man influenced his students in the most profound way.  their music, their choreography, their deep respect--all comes directly from this talented man.  as other white band leaders from back in the day noted: their students played the music; prof's students lived, loved and felt the music--from their soul; their thunder soul!  there is now a memorial park for prof on the grounds of kashmere high school; the kashmere alumni stage band is available for gigs; the recordings have been re-released and are available for purchase.  what a difference one teacher can make in the lives of so many students! 

46. THE LAST WHITE KNIGHT

in the early 60's, paul beckworth made a decision to travel from his home in toronto canada to join the SNCC (student non-violent coordinating committee) whose mission was to register black voters; he was assigned to greenwood ms.  on his first day there, approaching the courthouse, he encountered 4 men, one of whom punched him in the face.  he ran.  the assailant was delay de la beckwith, the son of byron beckwith, who was eventually imprisoned for the murder of medgar evers.  after 45 years, paul decides to have a conversation with beckwith.  interspersed are conversations with harry bellafonte, morgan freeman, fbi agents, local residents, and a particularly chilling conversation with three current klan members, who remind us very clearly that blacks are inferior in every way.  beckwith is somewhat charming, somewhat sinister, often smirking for his intolerances of black president obama "the devil"; his lack of remorse for the hatred he spews; the inferiority of anything other than white america.  he does note that he's the last white knight..........at least of the beckwith lineage.  his children don't follow his beliefs.  he is forthright in his prejudice, but polite in speaking of it.  oh, by the way, paul is jewish and there are plenty of suggestions by beckwith as to why jews shouldn't be trusted or tolerated as well.  is there reconciliation in mississippi?  maybe some.  there appears to still be a lot of underlying hate.  scenes with children of mixed races promote hope.  however, bellafonte notes, "i don't trust mississippi.  i don't feel safe here".  what's to be made of the handshake at the end; the declarations that the two are "friends"?  does understanding another's point of view make intolerable events more tolerable?  i felt paul asked pointed questions in a kind, nearly non-judgmental way and i felt delay answered them from a point of view of not really having done too much wrong.  i want to believe in the hope of those children from the film and i also believe that one can't watch, listen and contemplate TOO much of the racial struggles of our American past.

45. THE ELEPHANT IN THE LIVING ROOM

we don't see any elephants in this film about exotic animals raised in captivity.  we meet tim harrison of ohio, in his job of public safety.  tim reponds when dangerous exotic animals raised in captivity either get loose, are set free, or who injure their owner or someone else.  tim got involved when a friend of his died at the jaws of the pet snake he raised in captivity.  we see news clips of wild animal stories, such as a chimp attacking hit owner, a girl attacked by an alligator, numerous pythons or other deadly snakes set loose into nature.  during a hunt for a wild cougar in southern ohio, tim laments, "am i a hero or a villian?  nothing good comes out of my dealings with big cats."  tim is noticeably shaken by this revelation.  ohio was one of a handful of states without a law concerning private ownerrship of deadly exotic animals.  tim wanted to change that.  in a part of the film we see an exotic animal auction in the heart of amish country; certainly bizarre.  however, the bulk of the fim revolves around terry.  suffering depression after a back injury, he chose to buy a lion and then got another. lambert and lacey.  lambert escaped his enclosure one night and was on the highway, attacking cars.  terry had to better control this animal and resorted to keeping the two in a horse-type trailer.  tim gets to know terry, lambert and lacey.  while most of us would say, "what is he, crazy to keep lions?", we see how deeply sentimental terry is regarding his animals.  there are twists and turns in this story; it felt suspenseful, so i don't want to share too much.  tim tries to locate an appropriate environment for this small pride, as terry deeply considers his life without his animals.  there is DEEP emotion here!
so, as you consider how much that pet dog or cat means to you and your family, at least some owners of dangerous, exotic animals feel the very same way.  after the story unfolds, we do learn that the governor of ohio signs a law preventing private ownership of exotic animals, a triumph for tim harrison.  for so many, pets make life worth living.  hard to believe when it's a snake or alligator for sure, but not very hard at all when you see terry with his lions.

44. HIPPIE MASALA

india.  the place where many hippies migrated to back in the 60's.  the film focuses on 6 individuals, 4 from europe and 2 sisters from south africa who stayed and made india their home.  one is a yogi; a woman is a meditator; the sisters sell clothing on the beach in goa; one is a farmer in the himalayas; the last is a painter with a wife and several children.  we see a lot of smoking what is assumed to be a drug of some sort.  its a long tube, that looks like a cigar, but hard, with the burning part on the inside.   it's obvious they all live simple lives.   the painter laments that he's an outsider; the wife of the farmer laments that when she went to live with the outsider, she was shunned by her family, friends and culture.  she tells us of her dream--she is single; she travels to europe and then comes back home.  her husband isn't so nice to her and she looks so sad when she talks.  however, the most fascinating part to me wasn't the individual lives of the hippies, but rather all the scenes of life in the culture of india.  there really isn't any geographic context, so it's unclear how close to each other these individuals live.  there are many scenes regarding religion, but no explanation of just what is happening or being celebrated.  being not so flexible myself, i'm amazed at the crouch that these people spend much of their time positioned in.  i think that i could never achieve that.  old stoners getting old; living a life that escapes them from a life they didn't find satisfying.  rebirth in mother india, one says.  i just wished they looked happier.

43. H.H.HOLMES: AMERICA'S FIRST SERIAL MURDERER

a con man, swindler, crook....a physican, trained at michigan state....the first serial killer in america.  h. h. holmes, one of many aliases, lived in chicago in the late 1800's.  though various frauds and scams, he was rather wealthy.  he built a huge home in englewood, outside chicago.  it was known as the castle, designed by him.  the multi-floor building was constructed with maze like hallways, tunnels, secret panels, airtight rooms with gas jets hidden in the walls.  though he had killed previously, he took advantage of the world's fair in 1893 to lure people into his "hotel", many never to leave.  his downfall came after staging a mock death of an associate, for the purpose of earning a large insurance policy.  he'd been arrested just prior to this, on another charge, bragged to a cellmate of his plan, and then, unwisely, double-crossed that same man.  ultimately, he was chased by the pinkerton agency, located, arrested, charged, tried and found guilty.  in prison, waiting his execution, he wrote his memoirs in great detail.  weirdly, one of the facts that i learned from this film is that he often reassembled the skeletons of his victims, which he then sold to numerous medical schools.  i wonder where those medical schools figured that he got all those skeletons?  h. h. holmes was hanged in 1896, 35 yrs old.  at his request, he was buried in a big slab of concrete, due to his fear that he would be dug up and studied.  no one knows how many people he actually murdered.  he wrote that he was born with the devil in him--is that true?  what explanation is there for people like this that find perverse pleasure in taking the lives of others?  i wonder if there were actually any other "multi-murderers" in america before h.h. holmes?

42. SCATTER MY ASHES AT BERGDORF'S

a peek behind the scenes at bergdorf goodman, the iconic, high-end new york city department store; the store with the clout to make a designer a star or keep him/her at second best.  to "show" in bergdorf's is apparently a designer's ultimate goal.  i didn't know.  but, then, i'm not much of a fashionista.  there are tons of interviews with designers, as well as personal shoppers, buyers, owners, and finally, the window decorator.  bergdorf windows are highlights and, by what this film shows, must cost a fortune!  custom art is created to make a window, or antique are purchased; the dresses come SECOND, and are chosen to fit the look of the window.  overall, there was definitely new information in this film, but is it any information that really matters?  i realize that fashion is life to so many, especially in new york.  but for me in my life, there's very little in this film that i need.  the title came from a cartoon in the new yorker.  two women having lunch, and one says this line to the other.  i expect my ashes will be spread at any number of places OTHER than bergdorf's.

41. VIVAN LAS ANTIPODAS!

we have all said it.....we're going to dig to china.  i learned that an antipode is when 2 land masses can connect through the center of the earth.  and, the way our world is laid out, there aren't a whole lot of them, since drilling through many points would just get us into ocean.  the director is kossakovsky, and he visits 4 antipodes and films them luxuriously.  eventually, after either stunning vast overviews, or very detailed minutia, we get a hint of the lives of the people living in these places.  the photography is stunning; the pace is slow, but allows us to feel the presence of the landscape.  we start in rural argentina, with 2 men who live near a river and operate a toll bridge.  they know everyone who passes; they are in tune with the nuances of nature.  contrast that with its antipode, shanghai china, which is bustling and crowded, with masses of people all going here/there with no visible interactions.  the next is lake bakhail russia, a rural agricultural location, and its antipode of patagonia chile, another agricultural location.  the antipode of botswana with the big island of hawaii was interesting, much because the director contrasted the wrinkled form of the lava flows with the wrinkled hide of elephants.  the images of nature for these two were really amazing.  super close ups of flowing lava and super close ups of lion, giraffe, and hippos.  finally, there was the north island of new zealand and a location just north of madrid spain.  this was weird because new zealand footage was mostly on the beach, where a dead whale was on the shore, with concentration on the efforts of some people to dispose of the carcass.  overall, i learned about antipodes and i watched stunning photography, but i thought the editing was uneven and it was a little slow moving for my taste.  there was a delightful film style throughout; as we moved from one antipode to the other, the camera was upside down, like you would imagine it as a child, if you didn't know about gravity.  thinking about what can be found on the other side of the world from where we live is reinforced by a film like this.  there are very real differences, but there are simply the lives of real people in these places as well.  here in st. louis?--our antipode is somewhere in the middle of the indian ocean!

40. FAME HIGH

well....let's see what i learned.  parents will go to great lengths for their children.  parents who didn't achieve their life goals will go to great length to have a successful child.  parents may have an extremely talented child, but not view that ability as worthy.  some children know from a very young age what their life passion is meant to be and make great effort to that end.  fame high tells the stories of a four teens who attend LACHSA--los angeles county high school for the arts.  getting into LACHSA is, in and of itself, an accomplishment gained through audition.  there are only 130 spots each year; the tuition is free; the competition very high.  we see a couple freshman and a couple seniors profiled in this film.  we meet the parents and hear the stories of how they came to be at this school and what they hope to gain for the future from their high school efforts.  we see angst, hope, fear; we see intense mentoring from the staff; we ultimately see the outcome of each student's journey.  this program makes me remember the tv show "fame", but with real students, real parents, real struggles and real successes.  yes, it's SO true.....parents will go to great lengths for their children.  i enjoyed this film.

39. (A)SEXUAL

so............it's obvious that in the world, there are all sorts of relationships.  hetero, bi, homo, and many combinations.  this film concentrates primarily on david, who founded AVEN (asexual visibility and education network).  some research shows that 1% of the population is asexual.....generally described to be those who don't experience sexual attraction.  they have relationships; some get married; some have had sexual experiences; some still have sex.  but, when they do, it seems to be as a compromise to the person they are romantically involved with.  can there be romance without sexual attraction?  we know there are many romances/marriages, relationships without sex, but those people often forego sex because of other issues.  asexuals just don't feel the urge; though, the point was made that many still masturbate, but for a physical reason, not emotional.  i think the bottom line is there are people who feel different and joining david's AVEN group let's them know they are not alone.  the point is also made that asexual is not the same as celibate.  the celibate make the choice not to engage in intercourse; the asexual just doesn't feel any desire to do so--no urge--no drive--no interest.  it's an interesting concept to think about..........what sort of relationship occurs without sexual intimacy.  even david raises the point, in a 2 year followup, that it seems sex might be the glue to the type of relationship that lasts; sex gives a relationship weight.

38. I GOT OFF TRACK. THE SQUARE

the square--that's tahrir square in cairo.  this film travels the course of 2011-2013, during the uprisings that eventually oust mubarek and then morsi.  we follow real lives of revolutionaries and members of the muslim brotherhood, as they interact, and debate.  while the characters we meet are generally likeable, and the footage is from the inside of the revolution--we are there in the square during jubilation as well as dissent, i found it difficult and somewhat tedious to watch.  this 1 hr and 40 min film took me over the course of several days to get through.  i don't know why exactly--you have to read it, but that's not unusual for a foreign film.  maybe because of the handheld nature of the filming?; the timeline over the course of a couple of years?; the difficulty i found in sometimes keeping straight who was for what cause? the immersive nature of the filming technique?  in the end, i know this is an important film; telling a story of the desire for democracy amongst members of the same nation, but different mentalities, overshadowed by violence.  but, i'm sorry to say, i just didn't enjoy the experience.